Self-Esteem: What You Can Do To Improve It

Featured image: Self-Esteem Cliparts #251081 http://clipart-library.com/clipart/109882.htm

Confidence is a precious psychological resource and usually has a highly crucial factor in one’s life. It is closely related to achievements, good relationships, and satisfaction. Having little self-regard can lead people to depression, fall short of their potential, or tolerate abusive relationships and situations. On the other hand, too much self-love can result in an off-putting sense of entitlement and inability to learn from your short-comings. It can also be a sign of clinical narcissism where people behave self-centered, arrogant, and manipulative.

What Can Impact Self-Worth
Everyone’s experience with self-esteem is different over the course of their lives. With rises and falls, self-esteem is like a roller coaster of emotions and will vary even into old age. People who have steady diets of disapproval from people who are important in their lives, like family members, supervisors, friends, or even teachers can develop low self-esteem. Feelings of self-worth, whether high or low, begin in childhood. Some causes could be constant dysfunction at home, work, or school.

What To do To Help Improve Self-Esteem
One important detail is that no one person is less worthy than the other or should be deemed more important. It can help to put aside your fears of being worth less than others. You can also check out this article on what most confident people try NOT to do in order to maintain their confidence. Realize that nobody is perfect, including you. Self-doubt is not always a bad thing. Fear is a signal that you have not prepared enough or possibly need to take a break. Here are a couple of other things you can do to try and improve self-esteem.

  1. Try not to hesitate too much. Don’t obsess over what MIGHT go wrong.
  2. Don’t wait for the “big” move. When you envision someone confident, you may think of someone who takes big, bold actions like running for office. Remember that boldness and bravery in small steps can build on yourself through your feelings of accomplishment and reinforcement from others.
  3. Don’t confuse confidence with arrogance. Some people may fear being overly confident, causing them to “step on people toes,” take up too much space, or being a jerk. Remember, confidence is NOT the same as arrogance or narcissism. When you feel more confident, you often become less self-absorbed. Stop worrying so much about how you’re coming across, so you can pay more attention to those around you.
  4. Don’t fear feedback or conflict. Try not to get defensive when you get helpful feedback. When you have a conflict with someone, do not automatically go into defense mode. It is possible to speak your mind without conviction and listen to someone else’s point of view to reach a compromise.
  5. Do NOT fear failure. Having confidence doesn’t mean you won’t fail. It doesn’t mean you will always be happy or never experience anxiety or self-doubt. It means you know how to handle those feelings and push through to conquer the next challenge.
  6. Everything does not have to be perfect. Perfectionism is considered a flawed way of thinking that contributes to low self-confidence. Thoughts of having to have something completely figured out before taking action can keep you from completing your task.
  7. Don’t believe everything you see in ads. Companies that want to sell their products will usually start by making you feel bad about yourself. For instance, they may state that there is a “problem” with your body that you would have never noticed otherwise.
  8. Don’t believe everything you see on social media. This point is the same as #7. It’s easy to believe that everyone has the “perfect” marriage, a dream job, or supermodel looks, but remember that you ONLY see what they WANT you to see, and a lot of it is heavily edited. Everyone struggles with self-doubt, bad days, and physical imperfections.
  9. Don’t avoid trying new things! New things might bring some failures, but that is OK. Failures and mistakes lead to growth, and being more willing to fail, in turn, may help you succeed more because you are not waiting for everything to be 100% perfect before you try. Taking more shots will mean making more successes.
  10. Try not to focus on yourself. What we mean by this is, when you develop more self-confidence, you are less focused on yourself. We have all thought, “they’re all looking at me. They all think I look dumpy and that every word I say is stupid!” The truth is, most people are wrapped up in their thoughts and worries. Getting out of your head will allow you to be able to engage with others.
  11. Do not allow others to determine your goals. You are the only one that knows what is most important to you. Society says that having a better job, a bigger house or a fancier car is what you need to be happy. It takes strength and conviction to not go along with society’s expectations. Have the confidence to say, ” No, this opportunity is not the right choice for me.”

Have the confidence in yourself to make your own choices. Some of our providers specialize in helping others improve their self-esteem and confidence. If you live around the Wichita, Kansas area, give us a call at 316-636-2888 or visit our website at http://afcwichita.com/ to request an appointment and one of our staff members will get in contact with you. 

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